Posted on March 15,2017 in Divorce

The old expression “once bitten, twice shy” is often used to describe a person’s hesitance to try something again after being hurt by that thing previously. The maxim accurately sums up how many people feel after going through a divorce. Couples may enter a first marriage without considering how life’s realities can affect a relationship. Finances, children, in-laws, and jobs are all factors that can overshadow the romantic side of marriage.

People who go through a divorce, however, tend to have a much more realistic view of what a second marriage may hold. This is especially true for those who have gone through a messy divorce—one which may have involved drawn-out battles over marital assets and other finances. Therefore, when you are considering remarriage, there are a number of questions that you should discuss with your partner. Starting out on the same page can go a long way in avoiding another trip to divorce court.

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 Posted on March 10,2017 in Division of Assets

Millions of American households have at least one dog or cat as a family pet. Of course, many have more than one, as well as a wide variety of other animals. In a significant percentage of homes, dogs and cats are treated as more than just animals—they are truly part of the family. But what happens in a divorce? Can an agreement be made between the spouses so that each can continue a relationship with their furry friends?

Mutual Agreement

According to the law in Illinois, divorcing spouses can agree to just about anything in a divorce, as long as the agreement is reasonable and relatively fair to both parties. Most such agreements can even be included in the divorce judgment by stipulation of both parties. To that extent, pets can receive consideration as more than property in a divorce.

Depending on your specific circumstances and the temperament of your pets, you may need to be especially creative when it comes to developing a workable arrangement. Many animals are extremely sensitive to changes in their environment and would not do well in a situation where they went back and forth between two homes. Cats, for example, require fairly long adaptation periods to new surroundings, as do certain breeds of dogs. Others, however, would be fine to split time with you and your ex-spouse, though most experts recommend longer stretches—several weeks at a time as opposed to several days—to make the animals as comfortable as possible. Check with your veterinarian for his or her advice before you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse make any binding agreements.

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 Posted on March 08,2017 in Child Custody

In many divorce cases, proceedings to allocate parental responsibilities—previously known as child custody in Illinois—are challenging, nuanced, and emotionally-charged for all involved. It is not uncommon for “winning” child custody to become the main focus for divorcing partners and parents.

With such high stakes, the situation can quickly get very intense, and the spouses may have trouble communicating and negotiating. If you find yourself in the midst of a difficult and contentious dispute over parenting responsibilities, it is crucial to keep your child’s best interest as your top priority. To do so, you should make every effort to avoid:

1. Allowing Hostile Feelings to Take Priority Over Parenting

The courts are not concerned with why you and your partner are ending your marriage. If there are children involved and child custody is an issue, then the court is concerned with the short-term and long-term well-being of the children.

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 Posted on February 28,2017 in Child Custody

It is generally accepted by child development professionals and other experts that a child typically fares best after a divorce if both parents continue to play active roles in the child’s life. As a result, child custody laws around the country—including here in Illinois—have evolved to create a more cooperative approach to post-divorce parenting. While the trend toward effective co-parenting is overall a good thing, there are still some situations in which one parent may have good reasons to seek full control over all decision-making regarding his or her child.

Changing Terminology

The sweeping family reforms that went into effect in Illinois last year updated a number of statutes related to divorce and child-focused issues. One of the most noticeable changes—at least to the outside observer—was the elimination of the term “child custody” along with the use of the word “custody” to describe parenting roles or situations. The amended law no longer refers to sole custody or joint custody arrangements, nor does it label either parent as the custodial or non-custodial parent. Instead, the law refers to the entire process as the allocation of parental responsibilities. The intent of the change was to minimize battles over titles and names so that the parents could better focus on what is best for their child.

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 Posted on February 27,2017 in Family Law

In June 2015, the United States Supreme Court issued a landmark ruling that effectively legalized same-sex marriages across the country. The decision put to rest decades of debate over certain restrictions that some states maintained in regard to regulating the institution of marriage. The Supreme Court’s ruling, however, did not open the door for any and all couples wishing to marry. Each state, including Illinois, still maintains a series of laws that dictate who is and who is not eligible to enter into a marriage. Under Illinois law, an unlawful or prohibited marriage is one of the few situations in which an annulment may be granted.

What Is an Annulment?

In simple terms, an annulment is a legal acknowledgment that a particular marriage is invalid. The Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage Act (IMDMA) refers to an annulment as a declaration of the invalidity of the marriage. There are four basic grounds which an annulment may be granted:

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 Posted on February 23,2017 in Divorce

When you are going through a rough patch in your marriage, it can be easy to start thinking about what life could be like if you were single again. The stresses and challenges of married life may vary from couple to couple, and for some, the struggles simply become too much. Divorce has become increasingly common in Western culture over the last few decades, and the stigma that was once associated with ending a marriage has all but evaporated. Despite changing attitudes, divorce is still a major decision and a life-changing event, so the decision to divorce your spouse should not be taken lightly.

No Hope for Repairing the Marriage

According to the Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage Act, a divorce shall be granted to a couple when “irreconcilable differences have caused the irretrievable breakdown of the marriage.” While most people focus on their “irreconcilable differences,” the court must also find that the marriage cannot be saved. In doing so, the court may consider efforts already made by the spouses—such as marital counseling or couple’s therapy—or possible future attempts. If the court determines that reconciliation is not possible or practical, the divorce may proceed.

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 Posted on February 21,2017 in Domestic Violence

Earlier this month, the movie Fifty Shades Darker was released in theaters around the world. The film is based on a novel of the same name and is the second in a series that began with the now-famous—or infamous—Fifty Shades of Grey. The franchise has become widely popular taking a taboo subject matter and making it more mainstream, albeit with no small amount of controversy. Even with the book series having sold hundreds of millions of copies and the films generating substantial revenue, many women’s advocates and victims’ rights groups have decried the franchise’s depiction of coercive and abusive relationships.

Scandalous Appeal

When the first book hit stores in 2011, author E.L. James was credited with promoting feminine equality and sexual expression. The plot of the novel involves a young woman who becomes intimately involved with a successful businessman. Their sexual relationship is depicted as one that heavily includes various implementations of BDSM—bondage, discipline, sadism (or submission), and masochism. Fans of the series applauded James for promoting the freedom of expression for women to embrace their sexuality, even if doing so involves methods that are considered alternative or unusual.

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 Posted on February 16,2017 in Divorce

The decision to end your marriage is never an easy one. A divorce is often accompanied by a great deal of stress and numerous challenges to overcome. There are, however, a few things you can do that could help make the process easier on yourself and lead to a happier, more fulfilling future:

1. Educate yourself about your rights. Getting a divorce is usually one of the most confusing and complicated legal scenarios an average person will go through in his or her life. Research the law on your own and seek legal counsel from a trusted lawyer. You may also want to consider hiring a financial advisor;
2. Try not to let your emotions get the best of you. According to the Holmes-Rahe Stress Inventory, divorce is the second-most stressful life event a person can experience. Splitting from your spouse turns your world upside down. It is completely understandable that you will feel depressed, hopeless, and discombobulated at times. Avoid making decisions in haste or when you are in an emotionally-heightened state.

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 Posted on February 14,2017 in Divorce

Although changes to the Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage Act removed the factor of fault from divorce, social media may still be used as evidence. It can be used to determine if a spouse is hiding assets in a high net worth divorce. It may be used as a factor in the allocation of parental responsibilities and parenting time rulings. It may even make an appearance in divorce cases involving spousal support or child support. Yes, social media is becoming prevalent in divorces, and in many ways, it makes the investigation into a spouse’s background far easier than it used to be.

Divorce Investigation Before Social Media

Once upon a time, spouses and investigators had to rely on instinct and information they could gather on their own to expose acts of deceit. They had to hope information got thrown away or left out instead of locked into a cabinet. Some even went so far as to follow around one spouse or the other, taking photographs to document the subject’s actions. There would be mining of data that could be legally obtained, such as deposits and withdrawals from a joint bank account. Yet much of the pertinent information remained difficult or sometimes impossible to access. That was before social media, text messages, and other forms of digital evidence became so easy to legally obtain and/or accidentally discover.

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 Posted on February 13,2017 in Divorce

Today, it is estimated that approximately 90 percent of women take their husband’s last name when they get married. Some may choose to hyphenate both names or to keep their maiden names, but the practice, at this point, is centuries old and some traditions can be difficult to break. Whatever your thoughts may be on women taking their husbands’ last names in marriage, it is relatively easy for a woman to change her name back in the event of divorce. Most divorce proceedings—at least in Illinois—allow a woman to legally resume using her former name without a separate court filing.

Children, however, are a different story. Changing a minor child’s last name after a divorce can be much more difficult and typically involves an entirely new court proceeding.

What the Law Says

When a person is an adult, he or she is presumed to have the appropriate capacity to make decisions for him- or herself. Legally changing your name is one example of such a decision. If you decide to change your name, that is up to you, and you have to the right to change it whenever you see fit, including after a divorce. Changing your child’s name is not quite so simple. If your child is still a minor and you wish to change his or her name, you may need to take your matter before the court. According to the Illinois Code of Civil Procedure, a name change for a minor child will only be permitted if you provide clear and convincing evidence that the change is in the child’s best interest.

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