Are You Married to a Narcissist?

 Posted on July 24, 2015 in Divorce

Illinois couples may elect to initiate divorce proceedings for a variety of reasons. In some cases, a spouse may have mental health issues that contribute to or cause a breakdown in the partnership. While the spectrum of mental health issues and personality disorders is broad, one disorder that is often misunderstood or overlooked is narcissism. Contending with a narcissistic partner can be an emotionally exhausting experience and many spouses may be unaware of what exactly they are dealing with and just how much of a toll it is taking on them.

Many experts in wellness, both mental and physical, have thought-provoking ideas about how a relationship with another person can be unhealthy if that other person has narcissistic qualities. A person’s holistic wellness in relationships is about having healthy, positive people around us which, in turn, creates healthy, positive relationships. Keeping a narcissist in one’s life can only contribute distress, thus deciding to end the relationship, if it cannot be changed, is often imperative.

Is my Partner a Narcissist?

First, though, one must identify if the person in question truly is a narcissist. Such a person tends to have specific personality traits. A narcissist will generally blame others for issues that occur and will not often shoulder the responsibility and make needed corrections. When confronted with these and other problems, said person will rarely show emotion. If a narcissist shows emotions, he or she is likely to blame the partner.

Energy Vampires

Narcissists also drain energy from of his or her partner. Therefore, the partners often feel exhausted emotionally from trying to keep the relationship afloat and physically from completing all the tasks the narcissist cannot be bothered to do. Sometimes, people are drawn to this personality type because they tend to be charming and, at first, their irresponsibility is not apparent. That same charm will give a feeling of endearment, but the mood can change dramatically and quickly if things do not go the narcissist’s way. Reasoning through the problems in the relationships is almost impossible as this personality type may make his or her partner feel as though it was the partner’s fault, again not accepting responsibility.

Loss of Self-Esteem?

When the partner of the narcissist begins to lose self-esteem, it may be time to leave the relationship. One should physically and mentally distance himself or herself from the person as quickly as possible. Though this is a difficult task, and more difficult to leave altogether, it is a necessary step to finding wellness. The problem is the narcissist, not the partner. Finding positive people for support and self-respect is the most important step in healing.

At the Pesce Law Group, P.C., we understand and are sensitive to the challenges that contending with mental health issues can present in relationships. If you are considering a separation or divorce from your spouse, please consult with Naperville divorce attorney for more information. Contact us today at 630-352-2240 to schedule your complimentary consultation.