Eight Pieces of Advice for Surviving Your Divorce

 Posted on February 16, 2017 in Divorce

The decision to end your marriage is never an easy one. A divorce is often accompanied by a great deal of stress and numerous challenges to overcome. There are, however, a few things you can do that could help make the process easier on yourself and lead to a happier, more fulfilling future:

1. Educate yourself about your rights. Getting a divorce is usually one of the most confusing and complicated legal scenarios an average person will go through in his or her life. Research the law on your own and seek legal counsel from a trusted lawyer. You may also want to consider hiring a financial advisor;
2. Try not to let your emotions get the best of you. According to the Holmes-Rahe Stress Inventory, divorce is the second-most stressful life event a person can experience. Splitting from your spouse turns your world upside down. It is completely understandable that you will feel depressed, hopeless, and discombobulated at times. Avoid making decisions in haste or when you are in an emotionally-heightened state.
3. Reach out for help. Friends and family of those going through a divorce often want to help but are unsure as to how. Do not be afraid to admit that you need a hand. Ask a friend if they would be willing to babysit your child so you can have a night to yourself or if a family member would consider making dinner for you. Keep in mind that asking for specific needs to be met is easier on your friends and family than expecting them to guess ways that they can help.
4. Take time to relax and recharge your batteries. There is nothing selfish about taking care of yourself during the turmoil of a divorce. Go to a spa, cheat on your diet, or take a long leisurely walk in the park. Be kind to yourself.
5. Take the high road. It will be extremely tempting to do or say hurtful things to your spouse out of spite--especially if he or she has wronged you. It is important to remember that fighting will not solve the issues or settle the divorce any faster. Be the bigger person, even if it means swallowing your pride.
6. Resist starting a new romantic relationship just yet. Understandably, you will be lonely and want companionship during the break-up, but try to resist dating immediately. You need time to grieve the loss of your marriage before jumping into a new relationship.
7. Do not involve your children in your divorce beyond what is appropriate. Many individuals make the mistake of using their children as mediators or even weapons against their spouse. Not only can this hurt your children, it is likely to create even more resentment between you and your spouse.
8. Keep your head up. Divorce is messy and disheartening, there is no denying it. Remind yourself, however, that you will get through it and that you are strong enough to endure. Literally millions of people have trudged through this process and have come out happier and healthier on the other side. There are many reasons to have hope.

If you are considering a divorce, an experienced DuPage County divorce attorney can help guide you through the process while fulling protecting your rights. Call 630-352-2240 for a free consultation at Pesce Law Group, P.C., today.

Sources:

https://www.stress.org/holmes-rahe-stress-inventory/

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/dating-decisions/201406/the-truth-about-rebound-relationships

http://www.womansday.com/relationships/dating-marriage/advice/a6834/divorce-advice-women/